Cleanup Crew

Log Info

• Title: Cleanup Crew
• Emitter: Telamon
• Characters: Dirk, Braith, Patch, Finn, Slixvah
• Place: Lower Markets
• Time: August 5th, 2022

The Adventurer's Guild is a place where jobs of all kinds can be found. Usually it's of the 'stab bad guys and take their stuff' variety, but this one is a little different.

The fussy little lucht is standing on a box at the lectern, as the five of you enter. Dressed in light, elegant clothes, he waits for you to take your seats before clearing his throat, smoothing his pencil-thin mustache before speaking. "Yes. I see you're all here, so... Messrs. Dewee, Huoy, and Luwie have entrusted me with the disposition and dispensation of the estate of Reubeus Garett. The man passed away as a result of..." He peers at his papers, before continuing, "...old age and misuse of sage's brew. Tragic. However, his shop was reputed to have an extensive security system."

"Now, before you ask, yes, we have writs from the city guard to enter -- as well as Mister Garett's key." He holds up a heavy brass key. "When Mister Garett collapsed, this was on him, and it's been confirmed the shop was locked up. All you need to do is go in, ensure the security systems are deactivated -- with a minimum of mess, if you please -- and back out again. Please do not indulge in 'stickyfingers'." The halfling gives you all a reproving stare. "I am well aware of the reputation of some adventurers. Let's not add to it, hm?"

Braith cocks her head to the side a little and listens as the job is introduced. She hmms a bit, "Any idea of what the systems might include?" she asks her hands absently rubbing at her warhammers on her belt.

Dirk settles in his seat, his tricorne in his lap as he waits for the others to arrive. He idly scrapes at the bowl of his pipe with his pocketknife, looking up to the others as they join. "Oy, Slix. Braith. Patch. All right?" he rumbles by way of greeting. As the Guild contact begins the briefing, he turns his attention back to the front. A dour scowl furrows the old snowbeard's brows as they're warned against stickyfingering. "Hrmph. I'm nae thief," he grumbles. "'sides, what am -I- goin' tae do wi' some magicked widgets? Like as not get me arse turned intae a toad, knowin' -my- luck." He harrumphs, folding his pocketknife and tucking it into his pocket along with his pipe. He rises to his feet, setting his tricorne atop his head. "What sort o' security are we talkin'?" he asks. "Golems? Zombies? Wicked Traps or Devices Infernal? Evil Demons of Evil What Come From Beyond All That Space? What're we dealin' with?"

Amongst the room was possibly the most outrageously dressed: an egalrin woman covered in ribbons, a rainbow across her wings that were a swirled mix as they were tucked in tight behind her. She's twirling an ivory stick with teardrops painted on it, leaning against a wall. "Ey, ey, ey, ain't got no sticky fingers 'ere," she puts her other hand up defensively. "I studied some mojo's before gettin' here ta seek out magic and the like. And maybe disable somethin' somethin' if it gets right nasty.

She passes a gaze over those collected. Dirk (an upnod in recognition and greeting), Braith and Finn(a little waggle of a wave), and Patch. She runs a hand over her feathers, pulls free a loose rusty red one, and offers it to her. "It's dangerous to go alone, sugar, take this," she coos.

Slixvah adds, "I'm doin' good, honey Dirk. Thanks fo' askin'. How 'bout ya self?"

Patch fiddles with the sleeve of her coat after having taken a seat near Dirk. She listens, and at the last few lines and points to Dirk when he makes is statements, and asks his questions. Yes, he's on top of that, and she'll let him be.

"Almost insulting, but... there are a lot of shady people, even those working for the guild." Patch says, smirking to Slixvah as she notices the rainbow-winged wonder. She takes that offered feather, raising it as if to inspect, and appraise, eyes seeking. "Oh yes, this is worth more to me than any lousy trinket they have." smirking back to the Egalrin as a light flush rests on Patch's cheeks. "Thank you. Truly."

A sourceless breeze brushes past the dawn elf.

Finn sits near the back, arms crossed in a posture somewhere between defensiveness and boredom, the man's short mohawk apparently freshly done. It helps to draw attention when he turns his head, looking at the little lucht. "Go in. Don't make a mess. Don't steal anything." He repeats the most straightforward bits. "Dammit. I thought this was gonna be a *fun* job." A shake of his head. "Least it pays well."

The fussy little lucht factotum humphs. "Don't blame me, it's just one of the perils of working with... ahem. 'special assets'." Clearly, that -wasn't- what he was about to say. "In any case, Mister Garett was an artificer-engineer of considerable skill, though he had become more reclusive and paranoid over the last year. We presume there will be at least one construct; he had a low opinion of necromancy, calling it 'incompetent bone-fondling'. But beyond that..."

The lucht stacks his papers, making sure they're neat. "I'm afraid the abuse of sage's brew did Mister Garett no favors. An object lesson in why you should not indulge in magical drugs, I suppose."

Braith nods and listens as she turns and looks at the others for a moment and nods, "Artificer means probably some interesting systems." she shakes her head a bit and nods, "Well ready whenever you all are."

Dirk harrumphs. "Aye, certainly not," he grunts. "I hear tell there's some o' those magicked brews that make ye piss purple. Where does -that- get fun, eh? I'll stick tae plain beer an' the tobacco I've grown meself. That's plenty fer anyone, I'll warrant." He grunts, shaking his head. "Artificer. Aye, constructs and/or golems. Well this should be all -manner- o' fun, nay?" He looks to Braith and nods his head. "Aye, let's get this seen to. Sooner we get this mess sorted, sooner we get paid."

Slixvah gives a little crinkle eyed smile towards Patch before shrugging a shoulder at Finn. "'ey, I've had enough dealing with undead and the like; this is a nice change of pace," she opines before stashing the wand into one of the many robes she has. It's replaced with another: a dark wood with a white feather feather dangling off the haft of it. She grinds her beak at the mention of necromancy, but she keeps her opinions to herself. "Yeah, robits and doodads that ain't like gettin' fussed with," she complains before snickering. "Hey now, some magic brews are suuuuper fun."

"Anywho, like I said, prepared to search and disable today. Oh. If ya'll get a boo boo lemme know, aight? I can fix ya."

She steps off the wall, ending up near Patch. "Check the place up and down, don't break nothin', disable security, gotcha gotcha."

Patch felt the quick breeze, the feather eyed with a raised brow as a chill takes her. It's careful, the feather placed in her coat. "Yes, ready." her words a world away as she echo's Braith. Slixvah is glanced at, but no words, just watched for a brief moment.

"I-incompetent, what?" Patch turning slowly back to the the lucht in half-shock, and laughing. That pretty much drew her out of her stupor. "Yeah, not my idea of fun. I could settle on interesting. maybe piqued?" looking to the others, ready.

"Your confidence is comforting, Slix." the woman's talk, and banter of their work earning a smile and playful nudge. Soon she's on her feet, adjusting the gear she's brought.

Finn gives Dirk a little grin. "Pissing purple gets fun when you pretend to be drunk and use it to win a bet," he informs the other man. "If it turns the whole thing purple, all the better. That's just an open door to --" He seems to remember where he is, and looks around at the others. "Ah. Other. Things. Right." Clearing his throat, he stands up, looking over his gear once. "Ready as I'll ever be, I guess."

The five of you take your leave of the solicitor, and head off to Garett's shop, key in hand...

Soon, you find yourself in the trades district, standing in front of a sturdy building set up here. It's heavily reinforced with thick walls, presumably to prevent smash-and-grab thefts or internal explosions from causing havoc in the neighborhood. A sign over the door proudly proclaims this to be 'Reubeus's House of Wonders', and the windows are covered with iron bars. The door has a large brass key-hole, and is securely shut.

Slix slows as they arrive, her flipping the dark wood wand once, her snickering herself to herself. "Heh... purple worm..." Another flip, a flick, and a "an'tc ochtu hsti" activation, and a breeze brushes past the eccentric bird.

The wand is stashed away. "Well well well, this certainly looks like it's a... fortified place." She cracks her knuckles, reaches into her robe and-

The bird has a knife.

GAME: Slixvah used a Wand of Mage Armor.
GAME: Patch casts Detect Magic. Caster Level: 2 DC: 13
GAME: Finn rolls Perception: (6)+4: 10
GAME: Patch rolls Perception: (2)+8: 10

Braith cocks her head to the side and nods as she looks at the others. She pulls both of her warhammers off and gets a good grip on them. She is ready to go in and she waits for the others to be ready as well.

Patch laughs at Slixvah's words, looking up at the shop of curiosity and moving to the window as she mutters a blessing to herself a hand raised before her with a quick symbol made of fingers. "Vaire, hear me and let me see what magic lays in my way." a spell cast, a wisp of a smile on her lips, seeming content to climb on the bars and try and peer in. "Oh, no. Nope. Been a while, and the dust and dark make it hard. I can't see a thing." sighing and dropping back to the walkway. "Was worth a shot."

Finn gives Slix an upnod, waggling his eyebrows a bit. "I know, right? It's brilliant. You can't lose." As they approach the building, he steps up to the windows on the left, pressing his face close to the glass and peering inside. "Well," he reports, "doesn't look like our dead maniac was much of a housekeeper, wonder of wonders. Tables. Cases. Dust on everything, even the windows. How long ago did this guy buy the farm again?"

Dirk grunts a bit at Finn, but can't help but chuckle softly. "Aye, while that -does- sound like a good time, I prefer me hammer just the way it is, thanks," he says. "Never had any complaints yet." Slix earns a snicker from the old woodsman as they amble along their way. "Careful. They say purple worms can swallow ye whole. Wouldn't -that- be a shockin' way tae go?" he says with a sly grin. But then, they're at their destination. He looks up at the place, tipping back the brim of his tricorne. "Well... what an invitin' place -this- is, eh?" He shoulders his thunderbelcher, looking back to the others. He waits for them to make their initial assessment. "Anything?"

Patch adds after a moment. "The bars still have traces of magic... but nothing active. We should be careful, thieves or nefarious eyes might of taken notice too." she says, looking to the others, and back to the door. "I'd say check the roof, but that's my caution." a glance to Slix with a smirk at this, but she continues on. "That's it. I guess all we have left is to go in, and turn off the security."

Slix giggles, a little twittering sound as she steps forward after everyone's assessment. "'ey, that don't sound so bad!" she jests. A white feather is pulled free, and she chants, "I acn ese, I acn ighft!"

The feather emits a warm white hue, and she plops it right onto the top of her head like a little lantern.

Her free hand pulls out the key, twirls it on a finger as she lulls her head towards Patch. "As much as I'd love ta show off, Patch babe, I don't wanna be separated from ya'll if somethin' explodes up there. Anywhooo- time for my favourite spell, open sesame!"

Key. Lock. Click. Carefully shove the door ajar to see what's inside!

GAME: Slixvah casts Light. Caster Level: 5 DC: 14

The key works in the lock, and there's the soft click of tumblers disengaging. The doors swing open easily, and Slixvah's spell illuminates the interior.

It's clear no one's been here in a bit. Or perhaps, no one's done housekeeping. The cases scattered around the shop floor are dusty, and in each corner a large stuffed animal stands like a trophy. Dim light filters through the windows to add to the illumination.

Behind the counter can be seen an elaborately carved wooden mannequin, its face worked into a pleasant smile -- the tools of a master woodcarver. As you enter, the mannequin suddenly turns to look at you, and a voice comes from the unmoving wooden lips. "Welcome to Reubeus's House of Wonders." A pause. "I am afraid Master Reubeus is out right now, and the store is closed for business. If you wish to leave a message, please use the message book on the counter."

Braith Blinks and shakes her head, "So automatons of some kind?" she glances around to take a look at what might jump out at them, or things that she might accidently break.

Dirk boggles a little bit as well as the mannequin addresses them. He looks around, regarding the other stuffed animals. "Ohh -brilliant-. He was a bloody -toymaker-. Aye, -that's- never nightmare-inducin', is it?" he grumbles. He grips his thunderbelcher, looking around warily. "Just... so long as there's nae evil wee ballerina dolls or somesuch. Gods, I -hate- those, 'specially when they go all evil an' shite. Wi' the hair over their eyes. Eugh!"

"Shall we tell the creepy little wooden guy, or do you think it would even matter?" Patch asks as she enters after Braith and Dirk. A sweeping glance taking in the dust covered shop's features and attractions. "To think this place is just sitting here waiting for someone who'll never again walk its walls." a sad tone, shortlived as she turns and mumbles again, calling upon Vaire and Hymn to cast her magic, eyes seeking to find anything magical that is hidden on the inside.

A glance shot to Slixvah with a shrug. "I don't like this place much. I didn't before, but more so now."

GAME: Patch casts Detect Magic. Caster Level: 2 DC: 13
GAME: Patch rolls spellcraft: (9)+6: 15

Finn tenses a bit at the sight of the automaton, shoulders squaring up a bit as he stares at the thing, and then at the various mounted trophies in the corner. "Tarien's balls, but I'm glad this man is --" A glance at the mannequin. " -- not here. Indisposed. At the moment." A look around at teh others, waiting for someone else to do the talking.

The bird woman's casualness about this situation drops like a brick, her stymied in the doorway as the mannequin comes to life. She parses. Slowly glances about...

"Shit..." she tuts in the second most common tongue of the group with a gruff grunt. <Khazdul>

"I don't like it either. Play along, find the security system," she murmurs back to Patch, then the others. But. She promptly perks up, picks the proverbial brick back up, and saunters on in casually.

"Oh, really?" she says to the mannequin construct. "Darn, I was hoping I could catch him about this really fancy trade deal, all the bells and whistles. Came a looong way," she elaborates, stopping at the counter and inspecting the message book. "You got a pen, buddy?"

There's no message book. There's a bare spot where one should've been on the counter, but wherever it is it's gone. And just to accentuate the problem, the mannequin doesn't seem to realize it. "If you have no further business here, please depart. This is private property and we are not currently open for business." The mannequin actually raises its jointed hands, and makes 'shoo' gestures.

This close, Slixvah can tell even the -mannequin- hasn't been dusted in a while, and there's even cobwebs from it to the wall where it's been standing there.

Braith moves forward a bit into the shop, trying to get into the center of the building there is more open space there, she feels more comfortable if she needs to let loose.

Patch motions to the four stuffed creatures quickly. "The dummy, and the beasties.... some preservation magic. Beware" a hushed tone, twitching an ear in thought as her eyes suddenly go wide. "Slix!" Patch near hisses, finding herself following the Egalrin towards the counter as she tries to compose herself during the steps. Oh, play along? "If not, I am sure I have one somewhere." putting on her best face, and smiling, leaning on the counter and eyeing the 'book' that was mentioned, and then 'eyeing' Slix.

Dirk glances around, idly patting the butt of his thunderbelcher as he holds it cradled in his arms. "Oh, not tae fret, laddie," he says to the mannequin as he moseys around. He pauses to stoop over and examine something on a counter, before resuming his casual walk. "I'm just such an admirer o' Master Reubeus' work. His name is famous in Khazad Duin, ye know. An artificer whose work rivals that o' the dwarves themselves. So I -had- tae come an' see it fer meself! He wouldn't mind me takin' just a -few- moments tae have a look, would he?"

GAME: Slixvah rolls sense motive+2: (7)+3+2: 12

Slixvah just smiles at Patch. "Yes, a pen, you know. Ink, nub, gravity to make it flow out. All things that follow the /rules/ of its /construct/tion," she stresses syllables, glancing to the mannequin. Blinking, then huffing. "Bah, it's just goin' through a routine wit' a permeant message. Sorry Pattie."

She looks about. "Hmm... no book. He must have closed up shop and locked himself in the back. Preservation magics ain't too spooky... but... I can pull the curtain back from over here if ya'll want?" she offers, holding up a white gloved hand. A spectral copy floats next to it.

Suddenly, the voice coming out of the mannequin shifts from the pleasant tones to a gravelly, grumpy, older sound. "This is the voice of Reubeus Garett. If you're hearing this, you're in my damned shop without my permission. Leave now. I won't ask you again."

It's rather disturbing, hearing the voice of a man you know is dead. The mannequin itself actually rolls a few feet eastward. Rolls? Slix and Patch can see over the counter that instead of legs, the mannequin is on a curious frame that ends in six rotating wheels. The nominally cheerful voice comes from the wooden lips again. "I really must insist you leave."

"Your master died! He is no more. Reubeus Garett is deceased." Patch's eyes going from Slixvah to the construct, and back. Oh that was a creepy show, enough to spook the bard. Screw looking for a pen. "That's not going to work is it?" just now realizing what Slixvah's words meant. "Damnit. You'd think people would have arrangements for this kind of stuff. More so a wizard."

Patch backs away slowly with a few steps, waiting to see what the others of her group do. No sudden movements, no reach for rapier. Yet.

Finn looks at the mannequin, brow wrinkling a bit. "Bit presumptuous of a recording to think that we're in the shop without permission given that we have the damned key." He looks around at the others, shaking his head. "Anyone know how to turn that damned thing off?" And then a second later, "*Without* making a mess?"

Dirk startles as the mannequin barks at them in Garrett's voice. "Beards o' me fathers. That's just downright unsettlin', innit?" he grumbles. He scowls at the construct, lookin up and around at his comrades. "Afraid I don't know much 'bout these sorts o' things, laddie," he says. "Best I can do is take a shot at it. An' that'll probably just wake the whole damned place up."

Braith shrugs, "He probably did have an arrangment, just no time to set it." she glances around a little, gripping her warhammers a bit tighter.

The back of Slix's head raises up with fluffing feathers, like a cat's fur raising. She looks to Patch, to the construct, back to the Patch. "Wizards hate their stuff gettin' pilfered when they die, 'course it ain't gonna work," she chirps quickly.

The eccentric bird is distracted vaguely, thinking quickly on her taloned feet. "This thing was going through a routine. If the criteria ain't met then-"

She swivels to the other two briskly, Braith and Finn. One feather on a wing suddenly unspools like a wound ribbon and flies out towards Finn. "Eb afse!" she chants quickly, a brisk wind passing over him as a white energy flows down the elongated feather. "Get out of the doorway!"

GAME: Slixvah casts S1: Shield of Faith. Caster Level: 5 DC: 15
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20: (17): 17
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20: (15): 15
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+2: (8)+2: 10
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+2: (18)+2: 20
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+2: (13)+2: 15

It appears time's up. The mannequin declares, in Garett's voice, "Alright, asshole. Have it your way." It rolls suddenly to the end of the counter, and pulls something behind it. There's a loud CLUNK from three corners of the room, and the animal trophies there all open their mouths, a scraping sound from inside.

The fourth corner, in the northwest, the stuffed bear 'trophy' stirs, shaking off cobwebs and dust as it regards the party with glassy, baleful eyes. Its maw opens, but what comes out sounds slightly tinny and distorted for a bear's roar.

GAME: Braith RAGES!, gaining +2 to melee attack/damage/Will saves and 8 temporary HP
GAME: Braith casts Magic Missile. Caster Level: 4 DC: 13
GAME: Braith rolls 2d4+2: (8)+2: 10

Braith grips her warhammers tightly. "Well here we go," she growls, "I am not the bad guy." she says to the others and then reaches inside and calls on her bloodline, the rage that she has learned to harness. Her eyes turn solid black and her skin darkens just a little. She roars out ferally as her fingers elongate and turn black and slightly scaled. After a moment her hands resemble black claws gripping her warhammers. Her dwarven frame starts to swell and grow. When it stops, there is a massive dwarf, well over eight feet tall, wielding a pair of warhammers the size of earthbreakers. She gestures and points with one of her clawwed hands as she speaks the words, and two bolts of magic dart from her hand and fly to strike the bear...thing. No blood of course, but sawdust does start to come out with the hit.

GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+5: (1)+5: 6 (EPIC FAIL)

The mannequin comes rolling around the counter. "Intruder alert! Guards! Guards! Thieves in the House of Wonders!" Its articulated hands are now clenched into wooden fists, and it throws a clumsy punch at Slixvah that fails to even ruffle her ribbons. It would be funny, except gods only know what else the stupid thing has set in motion.

GAME: Slixvah rolls witch+intelligence: (5)+5+4: 14
GAME: Slixvah rolls witch+intelligence: (19)+5+4: 28
GAME: Slixvah casts False Life. Caster Level: 5 DC: 16
GAME: Slixvah rolls 1d10+5: (1)+5: 6
GAME: Slixvah rolls alertness: aliased to perception+2: (3)+11+2: 16

Slixvah's gut reaction was right. Things were spurring to life. "Incompetent bone fondling, huh?" she hisses, eye twitching. Her wings fold out in front of her, hiding her casting as she slams her hands into the ground. They alight with a sickly black and green energy. "Ouyr itme si odne, oblstre em ni itsm fo dene, l'Il upt ettre seu!" she chants lowly, as she does, the wood on the floor grows warped. Losing it's luster. It's shine. It's life. She yanks free a sickly green mote, then shoves it into her chest as she eyes grow in a green luster.

Wings explode outwards, all the feathers on them unraveled into ten foot long, winding coils as they drift on unseen wind. "I got this one, the security system is behind th' counter!" she hisses out quick.

GAME: Braith uses an AoO! 0 remaining.
GAME: Braith rolls weapon3-4: (11)+9+-4: 16
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+3: (11)+3: 14

From the southwestern stuffed trophy, the opened jaw of the hulking wolf spews forth something disturbing: a metal-scaled serpent that slithers free, and then writhes as it heads right for the suddenly larger Braith. Its mouth opens, long fangs bared, as it strikes at her, missing.

GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+7: (12)+7: 19
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d6+6: (2)+6: 8

The stuffed bear definitely does not look cuddly, or for that matter alive, as it stiffly stalks towards the intruders. With a tinny 'raaaar' (kind of pathetic really, did Garett skimp on the sound for it?), it raises a paw, slapping hard at Braith and connecting.

<OOC> Patch is going to step to 9x 13y, draw a rapier and then start Inspire courage for +1 on charm/fear and +1 on attack/damage

Patch disengages, nodding to Slixvah. She had hoped to do more, but that clerk was too much a threat. With a shift and heft, she takes her instrument she has on strap and leaves her blade for later. One arm cranks the wheel, and another plays against keys as she begins a haunting melody that drones, and does little to take away from this nightmare. "We came through the night, blind. Faced the dark days. Our hearts never got tired. We come alive... when it's do or die." her words helping in her magics casting, unable to reply, but hoping her inspiration can help others.

GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+3: (14)+3: 17

Another metallic serpent comes out from the northeastern trophy, this one arrowing right for Finn. Fangs flash, and the bite hisses by narrowly as Slixvah's magical ward protects the warrior.

GAME: Finn rolls Weapon1: (18)+8: 26 GAME: Finn rolls 1d3+1: (1)+1: 2

Finn barely has time to react as the snake slithers up on him. He uncoils the whip in his hand, striking at the thing with a loud *crack!* -- which seems to do absolutely nothing at all to the metal monster. His eyes widen a bit, and he mutters a colorful curse under his breath. "*Hate* these things..." he growls, looking around for -- well, anything that might be more effective than what he has.

GAME: Dirk rolls Shoot: aliased to Ranged+1-2: (17)+8+1+-2: 24
GAME: Dirk rolls Dmg: aliased to 1d12+4+1: (2)+4+1: 7

Dirk racks his rifle as the displays start coming to life. "Oh, piss up my arse, here we sodding -go-," he growls. He skips away from Braith as she embiggens, figuring she's a big lass now, so she can handle the stuffed bear. Instead, he swings his thunderbelcher and draws a bead on the one who started all these shenanigans. He sights down the barrel and pulls back on the trigger. CHK-BOOM! The thunderbelcher kicks, and a bit of paint gets shot off the roboclerk's dome as the bullet PYANGs off. "Ye know, this all would've gone -so much bloody easier- if ye'd just let us stay an' rubberneck a wee bit like we was wantin'!" he growls as he racks the slide again.

A third snake slithers out of the large lizard trophy, this one arrowing towards Braith as well... clearly intent on trying to box her in with its cohort and the hulking stuffed bear.

GAME: Braith rolls weapon3-4+1: (18)+9+-4+1: 24
GAME: Braith rolls weapon4-4+1: (19)+9+-4+1: 25
GAME: Braith rolls 2d6+7: (11)+7: 18
GAME: Braith rolls 2d6+5: (12)+5: 17

Braith growls as she gets attacked by the snake and while it comes close she swings and misses, but the snake does too. Then comes the bear and it takes a slice out of the massive dwarf. The other snake joins, "Gangin up eh, well got to take one of you out then." she swings first one warhammer and then the other at the bear, and smacks it with both really hard. The bear is still up but she did a number on it. "Definitely not flesh, probably not bone either." she calls out, anger rolled into her words.

GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+5: (8)+5: 13
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+5: (12)+5: 17
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d6+3: (3)+3: 6

The mannequin continues to blare, calling for guards, adventurers, investigators, and possibly a three-ring circus. It seems to have gotten a little distorted when Dirk shot it, but it hasn't been impeded as it swings its arms in metronomic blows -- the first one whiffing, the second clubbing Slixvah in the shoulder painfully.

GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+5: (14)+5: 19
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d6+3: (3)+3: 6
GAME: Slixvah rolls alertness: aliased to perception+2: (13)+11+2: 26
GAME: Slixvah rolls knowledge/arcana: (2)+12: 14
<OOC> Slixvah says, "HEX: Fortune on Dirk. The next d20 roll you make, you can roll twice and take the higher"

Slixvah gets buffeted in the side, the necromantic life bolstering her knocked away with a light gasp. She looks around, taking stock of everything, and then-

Music. An inhale. Courage. She vaults over the counter, taking a twack on the leg for letting her guard down as she limps over to where the clerk was fussing with something, her sub vocalizing with bird song to match along with the strange stringed instrument. "Ehh... shit. I don't fuss with this stuff! Ya'll know how ta break traps and stuff?" she calls out, looking over to Dirk.

The knife gets tossed into the air, held in reverse grip, and she grips at something in the air. "Dirk, give 'em your best shot, laddie!" she grunts over to him as she tugs on something unseen. <Khazdul>

It's like the wind calmed. The sight lines perfect. Conditions met for crystal clear shot. Pretty lucky if you ask me.

GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+3: (15)+3: 18
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d6+1: (3)+1: 4
GAME: Braith rolls fort: (12)+7: 19
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+7: (14)+7: 21
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+7: (14)+7: 21
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+7: (9)+7: 16
GAME: Telamon rolls 3d6+12: (11)+12: 23

One of the metal serpents finally lands a strike on Braith, drawing blood -- and as it draws back, dark liquid trickles from its fangs. Clearly, these chromed constructs imitate their living counterparts in more than just form.

The heavily battered taxidermied bear -- for that's clearly what it is, judging by the gaping wounds which show a metal framework as well as sawdust leaking from it -- is not going down without a fight. It lunges, its claws ripping into Braith, and then its teeth sinking into her as well as it mauls her as savagely as it might have done in life.

GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+3: (15)+3: 18
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d6+1: (2)+1: 3
GAME: Patch rolls fort: (11)+2: 13
GAME: Patch casts Cure Light Wounds. Caster Level: 2 DC: 14
GAME: Patch rolls 1d8+2: (6)+2: 8

Patch hears that struggle of Braith, a glance over her shoulder to see the woman take such heavy blows sends the bard scrambling. Her music is stopped, turning even as one of the snakes strikes her shoulder for her folly. A wince with pain, and the bard still manages to keep at it, her words flowing from her lips as she channels that touch of divine the hymn grants her. "Slow, and mend her wounds. Let them close, and keep her steady." a plead, touching Braith's side as the spell is complete, and a wave of health is granted by the power of word, and sing.

GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+3: (15)+3: 18

The metal serpent harassing Finn snaps at him again, and once again fails to connect thanks to Slixvah's protective spell. One could swear the construct is almost frustrated.

Finn's eyes continue to sweep around the room. He ducks out of the way of the serpent as it strikes at him, muttering another one of those colorful curses about divine anatomies. Not seeing what he's looking for, he withdraws completely, running over to Slixvah and the controls. "Please," he pants, "tell me that you know how to work this thing."

GAME: Dirk rolls Shoot: aliased to Ranged+1-2: (13)+8+1+-2: 20
GAME: Dirk rolls Shoot: aliased to Ranged+1-2: (1)+8+1+-2: 8 (EPIC FAIL)
GAME: Dirk rolls Dmg: aliased to 1d12+4+1: (3)+4+1: 8

Dirk's gaze flicks around the shop-turned-battlefield. Seeing Braith getting hammered by the faux-bear determines his target. He brings his thunderbelcher up, tucking it against his shoulder as he sights down the barrel. "OY! FUZZY-WUZZY! YER NAE A BEAR NO MORE!" he thunders as he pulls back on the trigger. CHK-BOOM! The bullet hits the notbear's flank. Sadly, hunting taxidermied fauna isn't quite the same as the real deal, so he's not able to bring his full skills to bear. It's an unbearable situation, but one that bears consideration all the same. "LEAVE OFF, YE OVERSTUFFED PIECE OF UPHOLSTERY!"

GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+5: (13)+5: 18
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d6+1: (1)+1: 2
GAME: Braith rolls fort: (13)+7: 20

The last metal serpent strikes at Braith again, barely cutting into her leg with its fangs and doing minimal damage, as well as failing to inflict any further problem.

GAME: Braith rolls weapon3-4+1: (12)+9+-4+1: 18
GAME: Braith rolls weapon4-4+1: (13)+9+-4+1: 19
GAME: Braith rolls 2d6+7: (8)+7: 15

Braith is beset on all sides, "Have ta gang up, can't handle a real woman can ya. Ya stuffed bastards." she growls as she gets mauled by the bear. She gets healed a little but the snakes take bites of her as well. She growls and roars and whips her warhammer at the bear and hits soundly, dropping the bear, even as she swings at the snake, though she is a little off balance so that blow misses.

GAME: Slixvah uses an AoO! 0 remaining.
GAME: Slixvah rolls feather slap+1: aliased to intelligence+BAB+1: (20)+4+2+1: 27
GAME: Slixvah rolls feather slap+1: aliased to intelligence+BAB+1: (13)+4+2+1: 20
<OOC> Telamon says, "Successful critical hit."
GAME: Slixvah rolls 1d3+6+1: (1)+6+1: 8
GAME: Slixvah rolls 1d3+6+1: (2)+6+1: 9
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+5: (3)+5: 8

As the bear crashes into a heap, the mannequin keeps yelling. "Cease! Desist! Looters! Help!" over and over. As it tries to pursue Slixvah, the egalrin witch's feathers curl and lash out, slamming it into the counter with a crash. It almost falls, but rights itself, wheeling towards her, now talking in Garett's voice. "Miserable, misbegotten..." Throwing a punch that doesn't even come close.

GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+5: (18)+5: 23
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d6+3: (1)+3: 4
GAME: Slixvah rolls intelligence: (5)+4: 9
<OOC> Slixvah says, "slix's famliar will fly to Braith (40' fly speed) and deliver a healing hex to her. Slix will standard to use to hex"
GAME: Slixvah rolls healing hex: aliased to 2d8+witch: (11)+5: 16

Slixvah just stares at Finn as he relays his question. "Honey, I most certainly do not, I just said I don't fuss with this stuff. I gotta help others."

She spies the clerk coming over briskly, and her ribbon-like feathers quickly braid together. "Would you kindly sod-"

The feathers can't do that much, they're just feathers. The resulting crushing and groaning of artifice says otherwise as shrapnel spray upwards into the ceiling. "-off!"

Still she's hit in the with a riposte, a cringe going through her as she falls to a knee to look at the device. "....aaaaah fiddlesticks I ain't got a clue what this is hon."

She looks over, seeing Braith's enlarged form taking some heat as she reaching into a robe and- "Fiadh! I choose you!"

"Please don't throw me-" THROW.

The little white thrush soars through the air and rests on Braith's shoulder. Their wings flare out, as does Slix's and both of their feathers turn into white strands that sink into the ground. Or, vanish painlessly towards Braith. Some wounds get rearranged. How lucky it was that most of those were totally superficial...

GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+3: (11)+3: 14
GAME: Patch rolls weapon5: (5)+5: 10
GAME: Patch rolls weapon5: (18)+5: 23
GAME: Patch rolls 1d8+1: (7)+1: 8

Patch huffs a breath, and flares nostrils at this situation. Braith is taken care of. Not by her hands, but well enough. The Hurdy is let loose, a bow drawn as she lets her instrument strike floor. "Oh, now I am starting to get mad." she says, her arrow drawn and let loose against the mechanical-snake-THING. It's a true shot, but it leave only a dent and a bit of disturbance to the things wobble. "Slix! Do I need to come look at it?" she calls seriously. She doesn't know what to do.

GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+3: (1)+3: 4 (EPIC FAIL)

The serpents continue to strike at the heroes, failing to do more than just be annoying. Perhaps Garett got them on sale, at the Copper General store or something. Or they're malfunctioning.

GAME: Finn rolls Int: (13)+Int: 13 (15) 
GAME: Finn rolls Weapon1: (11)+8: 19
GAME: Finn rolls 1d3+Strength+1: (1)+1+1: 3

Finn moves up next to slix, looking at the control panels. He looks over the various knobs and levers, reaching out and selecting one, turning it in just such a way that it *clicks* in a satisfying way. Over Slix's shoulder, he sees the other clerk coming, lashing out with the whip once again with that deafening *crack* -- which once again proves to be ineffective.

GAME: Dirk rolls Shoot: aliased to Ranged+1-2: (9)+8+1+-2: 16
GAME: Dirk rolls Dmg: aliased to 1d12+4+1: (3)+4+1: 8

Dirk has been watching the flow of the battle, switching from target to target with practiced ease. Seeing the mannequin taking a good chunk of damage, he decides to hurry it along on its journey to the rubbish bin. Planting his hand on the counter, he vaults up atop it. "Hup!" He turns, his cloak flaring dramatically behind him as he sweeps around to raise his thunderbelcher. CHK-BOOM! A spray of wooden splinters goes flying as his bullet slams into the thing's chassis. "THIS IS WHAT YE GET, YE BASTARD! NEXT TIME MAYBE YE'LL LET FOLKS DO SOME WINDOW-SHOPPIN'!" he growls as he racks a fresh round into the chamber.

GAME: Braith rolls weapon3-4+1: (15)+9+-4+1: 21
GAME: Braith rolls weapon4-4+1: (10)+9+-4+1: 16
GAME: Braith rolls 2d6+7: (9)+7: 16

Braith has been overwhelmed fighting multiple snakes and a bear and once the bear was down, she still has two snakes she has been fighting. She doesn't notice the one leaving just yet as she whips her warhammers at the snake, who the last time seemed to be a bit on the fast side. The first hit whallops the snake soundly while the second one fails to find purchase, leaving the thing still moving.

GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+5: (8)+5: 13
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+5: (5)+5: 10

The mannequin begins screeching loudly, "ALERT! ALERT! SECURITY SYSTEM COMPROMISED! ALERT! ALERT!" Swinging wildly now with its wooden fists, even as another shot from Dirk cracks its frame, the blows hissing past Slix's head as the frenzied construct tries to protect the shop.

<OOC> Slixvah says, "we are going to, and I cannot stress this enough, hit it really hard"
GAME: Slixvah rolls feather slap+1: aliased to intelligence+BAB+1: (20)+4+2+1: 27
<OOC> Slixvah says, "oh my"
GAME: Slixvah rolls feather slap+1: aliased to intelligence+BAB+1: (11)+4+2+1: 18
<OOC> Slixvah says, "um, does that confirm"
<OOC> Telamon says, "...Yes."
GAME: Slixvah rolls 2d3+6+6+1+1: (4)+6+6+1+1: 18
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20+3: (7)+3: 10

Slixvah taps her foot along with the last beats of the song, looking about the place she uses a wing of braided feathers to shield herself from the clerk. She grinds her beak, Patch's words further accelerating her processing. Think. Think! THINK!

"Naw sugar I think we got it! Use big girlie as a shield!" she twitters back to Patch before looking quite annoyed with the clerk. "I said, SOD-"

The ribbon-like feather's coalesce into a large mass behind her. A twist of the hips, a torque of the shoulders. And it crashes into it like one of Braith's raging hammers. Violently. Lots of crunching. "-OFF!"

"Security's turned off! Don't let it turn back on!" she advises, holding her dagger up defensively as her elongated wings slowly flow around behind her.

GAME: Patch rolls weapon5: (11)+5: 16

Patch still sees the snake, and even with Slixvah's words, she is going to shoot at it. Luckily as she backsteps through the mess of this engagement she misses, sending arrow into the floor with a loud /THUNK/. "Wait... how do we know what will set it off? Would that of...." biting her lip for a moment. "Set it off?"

<OOC> Telamon says, "Patch: high, low, even or odd?"
<OOC> Patch says, "High"
GAME: Telamon rolls 1d20: (15): 15

The metal snakes that were not engaged -- or perhaps, shot at and missed -- begin to slither away, back towards the trophies they had laired in. As if on a signal, or at the flip of a switch...

GAME: Finn rolls CMB: (11)+3: 14
GAME: Finn rolls CMB: (1)+3: 4 (EPIC FAIL)

Finn tries to run interference, leaning out to the side to pop the whip at the mannequin, trying to tangle its feet. Unfortunately, the angle is bad -- trying to do it with another person in front of you only *looks* easy when they do it on the stages, apparently.

GAME: Dirk rolls Shoot: aliased to Ranged+1-2: (9)+8+1+-2: 16
GAME: Dirk rolls Dmg: aliased to 1d12+4+1: (8)+4+1: 13

Dirk scowls as the mannequin flails at Slix. He ducks side to side, glaring down the barrel of his thunderbelcher as he draws his bead. Seeing Finn try to entangle the construct with his whip, he holds fire for just a moment. But it's not to be, alas. A prone target would have been so much easier to put down. "Damn it, hold -still-," he growls as his finger curls around the trigger. He waits for just the right moment as the brawl swirls before him. Right when the thing's head is in his sights, he pulls the trigger. CHK-BOOM! The bullet flies true, and the mannequin's head pays the price. Exploding with a shower of sparks, its mechanical head spins like a top as its body siezes spastically. "BZZZZT! INT-T-T-T-T-TRU... D-D-D-URRRrrrrr..." With a final sad-sounding bloop, the thing goes slack and ceases to move. Dirk pumps his fist with a growl. "BOOM! Headshot!" he says.

GAME: Braith rolls weapon3-4: (3)+9+-4: 8 GAME: Braith rolls weapon4-4: (17)+9+-4: 22 GAME: Braith rolls 2d6+4: (5)+4: 9

Braith is fighting the snake still, neither her nor the snake getting the message that things are mostly over. She swings her first warhammer and misses, but follows up with the second one and it connects and while it might not do as much damage as other hits have, it still is enough to cause the snake to stop moving.

And with that, it's quiet again. There's -some- mess -- a wrecked stuffed bear, the remains of a metallic snake, and of course the shattered mannequin. But at least the shop is still intact for the most part, and everyone's still alive. That's the important thing, right?

Slixvah flinches as the robot's head explodes, her giving a soft sigh and relaxing her shoulders. Watching the snake return back to its hiding spot, she turns back to the group. Some pain on her face, but overall, okay. "Ya'll good?" she calls, breaking the silence.

Fiadh flutters off Braith and lands on Patch's shoulder. The golden eyed thrush observing everything. "... anyone want they boo boo's fixed?" she offers, shaking her hand as the feathers on her arm turn to white strands that vanish into her robes. She inhales deeply, then sighs in relief.

GAME: Slixvah rolls healing hex: aliased to 2d8+witch: (5)+5: 10

-End Scene-

Combatty

Map: https://www.mipui.net/app/index.html?mid=mroei1d646h