Go Away

Some are watchers, others are doers. Aya is very much in the latter group. While she has occupied the chair in Daechir's room more often than not, being relegated (so she believes) to an observer with little or no ability to influence the situation is something she must divide into tolerable chunks.

She is present again once more, with the sun recently risen outside. A sun it was urged Daechir should see again, possibly for the first time in some time. It is an idea that she was completely approving of and prepared to do so this very morning... were it not for yesterday's encounter. Now she is less certain, concerns battling one another internally as she watches Daed.

Daechir has been frustratingly, and nearly completely unresponsive to anything since Dolan and Andelena had left. It's not been easy. He eats, he sleeps - though fitfully and often waking after only a few hours with jolts and screams. These subside after only a few moments, and then he falls back into his usual motionless revere. Now, like always really, he lays on the bed, staring off into space. Dolan's coin clasped in his hand. Nothing more, and nothing less.

Something within Aya finally relents, or is made to yield, and she rises from the chair to step to his bedside. There, she kneels. "Daed?" However low her expectations, she cannot do -nothing-, even it may not amount to anything. She lightly places a hand upon his. "Would you like to walk with me? Some fresh air, and light, would do you well." She can hope, though keeps it to a small one.

There seems no change in the man before her. No movement, no change in his breath or expression. But she is looking for something, anything, and she finds it. Just the most subtle shift in his eyes. From vacant gazing to despair in a blink of his red eyes.

That look -is- something... though a something that makes Aya regret wanting so badly for some reaction. "Daechir. It -is- me. You are safe. We are only trying to help you. I-" She pauses, uncertain what to say at all, much less what would be the right things, the most helpful things. Her eyes lower to his hand, where hers now strokes lightly. "We found you before. Please... let us find all of you."

Her entreaty has even less of a response than her offer. It's hard to say why he reacted - even in such a small way - in the first place, but his lack of reaction now offers even fewer answers. It is clear suddenly, and without question that it is very likely that he doesn't in fact trust her. That he has heard these words - perhaps even these exact words before.

It is very much as Aya feared, before. Expected? And she can't blame him for the distrust in the slightest. She doesn't blame him. She doesn't fault anyone for that; not for her choice, for what it wrought upon others, and whose body it was wrought under. That doesn't even touch whatever happened to him that she isn't aware of. None of this makes it hurt any less.

"I'm sorry..." Her eyes want to look away; to her hands, the floor, anywhere else, yet they also can't. She would never know if there was any reaction otherwise. "What do I do? How can I prove to you this is not some deception? That I am the woman who loves you?" It is as much her fretting aloud as a direct question to him.

"Go away." The words are direct, and completely unexpected. More, they don't sound like his voice at all. The sound like... rote. Like something he'd been taught to say. "Go away and never return." He closes his eyes, but not before she catches the edge of tears in them. She knows by his breathing that he is not asleep.

There it is. The most clear, direct, and calm response Aya has managed from Daechir to date. That it is given so clearly is completely unexpected and causes her to blink; yet she doesn't look away. It takes a moment for the response to fully register: the words, their rehearsed tone, the glint in red eyes before they close.

She is lost for words for another moment more with a renewed battle of thoughts and doubts. After her last efforts, she feared staying away from him was best; yet she couldn't abandon him! Now it's no longer her worry. It's his answer. Even if there is something behind the words that is not truly him... that doesn't make them entirely wrong.

"I... will do whatever is best for you, Daed," she breaks the silence softly. Her fingers on his linger a heartbeat longer before they slowly slide off as she rises to her feet. "I will go. I will stay away..." she promises that much, but no further, "until you might decide otherwise."

Tears leak from the corners of Daechir's eyes, his body trembling. He doesn't say anything, but rather seems... overwrought.

Only now does Aya look away from him, perhaps selfishly so. She cannot stand to witness the tears and be unable to dry them by her own vow, any more than she would have him possibly see her own that she can't withhold any longer.

"You won't be alone, even then," she notes as she moves for the door. No, she will see that someone will be here with him, if not her; he was alone with who knows what for far too long already. "Whatever you need, you will have, when you need it." For today, that seems to be her elsewhere, and so she departs. Tomorrow, or one day after, mayhap that will change.

In her absence, he weeps. Quietly, unobtrusively. She is gone a long while before he opens his eyes and finds her gone. "Aya..." He whispers her name, but she can not hear it.

He is alone.

-End