Once Called Home
The sun is setting in the west, and the wind outside is strengthening and growing colder, vermilion clouds scudding across the sky between patches of paling blue. The chill is still present inside the Temple of Eluna, but its usual peace and quiet is broken by what appears to be a relatively small conference of two or three white-cloaked figures, deep in conversation with a single armored figure on the steps that lead down to the clear pool before the altar. The conversation is peaceful and low in tone, out of respect for those meditating or conversing with other Seers on other topics nearby.
Seldan has arrived.
Dolan has left.
One of the people in this huddled conversation is the High Seeress herself Aki. She nods to the other priests gathered and looks at the armored individual. "Be at peace Silverguard. We support you in your endeavors."
Zeke, sighs and looking quite weary looks around the temple. It doesn't take him long to spot the group of priests and the armored one in their midst. Curiosity draws him closer, but not close enough to over-hear. It's not his place to intervene in such goings-on.
The armored figure, bright-haired, his armor toned down, but with all of his usual trappings in place, seems - absolutely stunned, although not in a bad way. His eyes lower, and he stares at the steps and down into the pool below, as if they might offer him the words to say. Nothing is forthcoming, not for a long time. "I-" he starts, then shakes his head. His back is to the door, and to Zeke, but the sith-makar will for once have no trouble reading confusion and disbelief. "You break with Llyranost in this?"
Aki nods once firmly, her eyes holding just the faintest edge of steel. "We do not condone slavery of any kind. Did you think yourself alone Silverguard? You should have more faith in those who serve our Goddess at your side." Yet her voice is gentle, holding no venom or harshness what-so-ever.
Zeke's eyes meet Seldan and he nods his head low to the other man. There's confusion in his green eyes to match Seldan's. He's far enough away that he can only catch the barest edge of what's being said, but Seldan's confusion is enough to warrant his own.
Seldan glances back at Zeke, and he quickly turns his eyes away, back to Aki and the others, then lowering them to the floor. It is quite obvious to anyone who can hear the conversation that that is precisely what Seldan had thought, for he meets no eyes, but the set of shoulders tells all - a thing unusual for the usually poised and reserved Silverguard. "Many here hail from Llyranost," is all he says in his hesitant response.
"Those who serve Eluna know loyalty to Her first, and nation second Silverguard. Those that do not are welcome to return to the lives they knew before Her grace." Aki says even more firmly. "So says our Goddess, and so says I; for who are we to question Her?"
Zeke waits patiently for Seldan, eyes roaming over the gathering.
Knowing full well that it is exactly as the High Priestess says, Seldan has no more words, and simply remains, staring into the pool below, entirely lost for words. Can he really trust the Temple? This is the answer he sought, and yet a whisper tells him not to trust, that he needs to protect himself, that there is another agenda here. So his mind whispers things that his heart knows full well are wrong. If what The High Seeress says is true - and he has no reason to doubt her - then he has been wrong this whole time.
The Seeress moves forward, touching Seldan on the shoulder. "I might not be able to see your face Seldan, but the Goddess tells me that your heart has grown hard. That you trust less and less with each passing day. Know that some stand at your side truly. Without expectation or judgement. Even as your kin does. She bids me remind you this."
Those words to Seldan are a dire warning indeed, and he draws a deep breath, then exhales it. Somehow, in that moment, he takes on the mien of a little boy being admonished, although not with the tension that might come with a true scolding. What is there to say to that? Reflexively, the paladin considers multiple responses, and in the end says none of them, instead nodding. "Your message is understood, High Seeress. I shall mend my ways, and seek such allies as I may." It is a reserved and careful response, of one accustomed to being admonished or lectured.
She smiles faintly as though amused at Seldan, and then draws him into a quick embrace. "She bids me give you that as well. For it seems you get few enough of them. We wish you the best in these trying times Silverguard." She moves backwards, motioning for the others to follow her. They disperse, leaving Seldan alone.
Once the priests have dispersed, Zeke heads toward his kin, watching them leave with surprise on his features. "What wasss that kin?" He asks curiously. "If you would ssshare wordsss..."
The embrace serves only to confuse Seldan further, and he looks after the group, sinking slowly down to sit not far from the pool's edge. He absently crosses his legs in a meditative pose, but before he can settle in, Zeke speaks up, and he looks up, pushing again that unruly lock of hair from his face and back across his hairline. "I - peace upon your nest, Zeke." He turns his gaze back towards the crystal-clear pool with its stars, careful not to disturb it. "Allies un-looked for and unexpected," he answers. "I am not so unwelcome here as I thought myself. Am I truly so wary of others that I know not my allies when I see them?" He is careful not to use the word _friend_.
"Peasssce on your nessst kin." Zeke says warmly, looking down at Seldan with gentle eyes. His tail flicks behind him, back and forth slowly. "You have learned the lessson of looking for enemiess well Sseldan. Perhapsss... too well? It isss hard to ssay. It hasss kept you alive to be wary, sssso it isss no wrong or bad thing."
"Enemies, and false friends," Seldan replies quietly, eyes still on the pool, his tones low. "For both of those have I had in no short supply. Do I look into the face of an ally, or a friend, and see an enemy? Do I expect to be used? To be turned upon? To be chided and admonished as a child, when I am not who someone would have me be?" He rests both hands in his lap now.
"Do you?" Asks Zeke gently, lowering himself so that he is sitting on his haunches. It is not a position that he takes often, but he hates to loom over his kin if he can avoid it. "Thisss one would not blame you if it were ssso."
"It is in my mind that it is so," Seldan admits, eyes lowered, not quite looking at Zeke, and not really concerned with his kin's position, looming or not. "Many claim to care, and yet do they care mostly for their own concerns. There are those who have been otherwise, but-" _Not many,_ is left to hang unspoken. "Perhaps the greatest concern is whether I lose my way, in being wary of such." _That is most likely what the High Seeress was getting at,_ he decides.
"Lossse your way in what way?" Asks Zeke curiously, wondering what his kin means by that.
"That I stray from the Dreamer's path and forget the way of mercy. Grow hard and uncaring." Seldan explains, resting arms now on knees, his gaze remaining on the pool. "That she mentions it bids me be wary, and that shall I do."
Zeke offers his claws to his kin. A gesture that Seldan has offered to him a hundred times. One which he has offered back in trying times such as this one. "You will not lossse your way Ssseldan. Your heart isss not hard, merely shielded. Protected. Thisss one ssseesss your kindness in every day. Thisss one thinksss that ssshe meansss to reasssure you. That you are not alone. That you need not shield ssso tightly."
Surprised and touched by the gesture, Seldan reaches out, carefully, to take the scaled claws, resting callused hands gently on them, his eyes still lowered. They tremble just a little, but steady after a moment. "Whether that is so remains to be seen," he murmurs. "Alexandria would have me travel openly within the city. They assure me that teleportation and scrying are not possible within the walls, and that they shall trace me, do I vanish. It is so that one more visible is more readily determined missing, but to what benefit of the Council is it to aid me?"
He turns his head slightly aside. "Nay. It is not in my mind that their intentions are for my benefit. They wish to use me to posture against Llyranost. To brew, perhaps, a quarrel. Why else would they ally with the Mythwood? And yet -" Here, he sighs heavily, a sharp exhalation of breath. "Let us, then, put this support to the test," he murmurs. "For I have had my fill of hiding, and of running. Let them come for me, if they will. Let them take me, if they can. I shall leave in the care of the Temple funds enough to raise me, if that be the will of the Harpist and of the Dreamer. For I fear not the judgment of the Dreamer. High Seeress Aki is not wrong, that holding a soul against its will is anathema to Her teachings. Perhaps it is they who ought ware her judgment."
Zeke is entirely satisfied to sit there and hold Seldan's hands. Offer him grounding and let him talk. He nods seriously to the other man's words. There's pride in his eyes as he views his kin. "Thissss one thinkssss, that you are very brave Ssseldan. Thisss one isss proud to call you kin."
It is clear, from the uncertain and halting nature of the words at times, that Seldan is unused to being granted the freedom to speak his mind, or the space to do so without judgment or admonishment. "There is more that I shall do, that I shall not speak of here. Perhaps they will grant me the use of a cell, within the Temple, as they have done before. I shall see to that, on the morrow, but evensong shall be sung soon, and perhaps may I assuage their worries, do I sing here." For all his face, he quite clearly wants to sing here, as he has not done so in over a full turn of the seasons.
Zeke wags his tail. "You ssshould go Ssseldan. You belong here. You dessserve to be here." He leans forward and tilts his head slightly to bump the other man with his forehead. It's a gesture of affection usually reserved for close family, and he's very careful of his horns, but Seldan seems to need this. Deserve this. "Thisss one will go home. Thisss one will ssspeak to you sssoon."
As the two talk, other white-cloaked figures are beginning to drift in, by ones and twos, as the sun prepares to make its exit for the day. He lowers his head to accept the bump, surprised by the gesture, but he finally looks up, and something of the lost and confused expression has resolved itself, replaced with a very small, but genuine smile. "As you will. If you return, you should do so now, that there be light enough to see you safely home. I shall return in good time."
With that, he gets to his feet, without leaning too heavily on Zeke's claws, and waits to see his kin out the door before turning back to the place he once called home.